Stupid Story: A Study of Music That I Hope Will Be a Hit – National
In the fall of 1922, a riot broke out in New York City over hats. A fashion rule forbade wearing a straw hat after September 1st. Summer was over and it was time to put away the straw hats. Some disagreed and the deadline was set for September 15th. However, wearing straw hats after that date was forbidden.
This rule was taken very seriously. Anyone seen wearing a straw hat after September 15th was subject to extreme public ridicule. Groups of young men prowled the sidewalks looking for violators, knocking their hats to the ground and trampling them.
Things took a different turn on September 13, 1922, when a fairly large group of young people decided to launch a preemptive strike. They began by trampling on the hats of factory workers in Manhattan’s Mulberry Bend neighborhood. They then moved on to dock workers. A fight broke out and traffic was halted on the Manhattan Bridge before the police intervened.
But that was not all. The following night, more attacks on straw hats took place. The streets were filled with teenagers carrying large sticks, some of which had a nail stuck through them, making them not only a tool for tearing people’s hats off, but also a weapon. On Amsterdam Avenue, a crowd of about a thousand people attacked people and their hats. There were fights, arrests and injuries. Several people were imprisoned.
And that was not all. Further incidents occurred in the fall of 1923 and 1924. At least one man was murdered for wearing a straw hat. The unrest continued until the early 1930s, when boaters went out of fashion.
This is the kind of history that is not taught in school. I think if it were, people would have a better understanding and appreciation of the world around us. I would also like to apply the concept of stupid history to the study of music. (Thanks to the TikToker who posted the story of the Straw Hat Riot and suggested the concept of stupid history. If I could find that video, I would give you credit.)
For example, many people simply cannot enter classical musicMaybe because they consider it a dry subject. But if we use the method of Stupid History, things get better.
Mozart Mozart is widely considered the greatest composer of all time with his symphonies, operas, chamber music and choral compositions. In 35 years, Mozart composed over 800 pieces that touch on all Western classical genres. The Marriage of Figaro. Don Giovanni. A little night music. Jupiter’s Symphony. The Magic Flute. You’ve all heard them. It’s some of the most beautiful and complex music created by man.
But Mozart was also a moody man. He loved to write songs about excrement and weird sex. There is a fairly large collection of canons, the most famous of which is this one.
Pretty pretty, isn’t it? The official title of this composition is Canon in B flat for 6 voices and was written in Vienna in 1782. The less formal title is Lick me in the ark. Translation: “Kiss my ass.” I would quote some of the lyrics, but I don’t need email complaints about my writing on perversions.
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Mozart probably wrote this song to entertain his friends over a good dose of alcohol. After his death, his widow tried to have these and other works like them published. But because of their crudeness, the lyrics were sanitized for nearly 200 years. It was not until 1991 that the original versions were made public.
Why is this book important to the history of music? First, it sheds light on Mozart’s sense of humor, scatological as it may be, which gives us insight into his personality. Second, it reinforces theories that this type of humor was much more common in 18th-century polite society than previously thought. Third, it helps us learn more about Austrian and German culture and folklore of the time. And finally, it contributes to the study of a field known as “scatolinguistics,” which is the study of the origin and use of swear words and foul language.
Is it stupid? Maybe. But it’s also fascinating, right?
Here’s a more modern example of the stupid history of music.
In the early ’70s, Iggy Pop was a voracious recreational drug user. Pot, LSD, PCP, heroin, cocaine: there wasn’t a drug Iggy wouldn’t try. And when you think of Iggy’s musician friends, Elton John is not a name that comes to mind. Yet the two are intimately linked by The Gorilla Incident.
In October 1973, Iggy and the Stooges were scheduled to play Richard’s Club in Atlanta. They were struggling and were just months away from breaking up. Meanwhile, Elton John had just released his legendary album Goodbye Yellow Brick Road album and was approaching the peak of his career. He had left the clubs behind and was on a massive tour of stadiums and arenas across the United States.
Elton was also competing with David Bowie for the title of the world’s biggest British rock star. Bowie, as you may know, was friends with Iggy and had worked with the Stooges. Elton thought he could have a little fun with Bowie and maybe even convince Iggy to sign with his new record label.
A reporter and photographer from CREEM magazine were recruited to help Elton support Iggy and lift the spirits of the Stooges. How could such support from one of the most famous musicians on the planet hurt?
A few days before Elton was to play in Athens, Georgia, he secretly went to Richard’s Club to see Iggy and his friends. But that night, Iggy was completely drunk, having disappeared with a local woman and swallowed his entire supply of quaaludes. As the band was about to go on stage and their singer was completely unconscious, guitarist James Williamson injected Iggy with enough methamphetamine to get him back on his feet and get him on stage in a semi-conscious state.
Meanwhile, in another area of the club, representatives from CREEM magazine were dressing Elton John in a rented gorilla suit. The idea was to surprise Iggy on stage, generating an article and some photos for the magazine.
Some songs in the set during Search and destroyElton, dressed as a gorilla, jumped on stage and started dancing. While the rest of the Stooges were not amused—James Williamson was ready to bash the ape’s head in with his guitar—Iggy, high on drugs, was completely freaked out. He thought he was being attacked by a real gorilla. It wasn’t until Elton’s costume head was removed that he realized what was happening. Elton danced for a few more songs before leaving. Iggy never signed with Elton.
Iggy Pop? Drugs? Elton John dressed as a gorilla? This, my friends, is the pinnacle of stupid music history. I propose we create courses on the subject at major universities around the world. We may not come out of it any better, but at least we can have some fun.
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